


lonely, but not when you hold me

by rusticshrubs



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Coming Out, Confessions, Gay Keith (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Lance Angst (Voltron), M/M, Romance, Sad Lance (Voltron), Supportive Keith (Voltron), awkwardly, voltron season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-31 15:57:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15122870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rusticshrubs/pseuds/rusticshrubs
Summary: Keith stared at the hearth of the flames, watching them sputter lightly like a weak spark to a match. He felt his skin absorb the heat, making him drowsy as he rested his cheek against his gloved hand. The warmth was a welcome luxury compared to the constant chilliness of the space whale he’d been on for two years.It was nice being back.-In other words:Late at night, Keith finds Lance asleep on the red lion's head. They have a conversation about their feelings.(Set after season 6.)





	lonely, but not when you hold me

The team was gathered in a messy circle around a soft, glowing fire. Subdued murmurs resonated from pockets of conversations, forming a peaceful atmosphere in the area. Separated groups were visiting, the oranges and yellows of the flames reflecting off the tones in their faces.

 

Coran, Allura, Romelle, Shiro, and Krolia eventually congregated to the lions, straying away from the shadows that covered the area. They spoke professionally, although a peaceful, more relaxed tone came from their words. Disappearing inside the black lion, they went to meet and discuss future plans for their return to Earth. The three Alteans were excited to see the planet, regardless of their unfavorable circumstances. They _were_ technically aliens, which they constantly seemed to forget.

 

Pidge, Hunk, and Matt spoke animatedly about a recent project regarding a new engine for the ship, all the while admiring the tiny diamond the yellow paladin had received days before. They all munched on buttered croissants and sandwiches while the Altean mice accumulated around the food. Pidge and Matt threw them pieces of the bread, much to Hunk’s dismay. Eventually, the group also dispersed from the fire, separating to their sleeping quarters, which were now the floors of their lions.

 

Keith sat quietly, gazing at the flickering light of the flames.

They had to make frequent stops to certain planets, gathering information and obtaining supplies for the new ship they were designing. Keith didn’t know much about any of the details, so he tried to help as much as he could.

 

_Which, unsurprisingly, wasn’t much._

 

Everyone besides Keith found _something_ to do; planning, writing, creating formulas. All he had was a unique space wolf and his strength. Neither seemed too helpful at the moment.

 

Alien planets were usually cold, but Keith hadn’t ever noticed it because of his paladin armor. Alteans from ten-thousand years ago added _heaters_ to the spandex-like material of their suits. Now all he had was his _now too-small_ outfit that rubbed uncomfortably against his muscular limbs.

Krolia insisted that he get rid of the musty Blade suit he’d worn out after their return. Reluctantly, Keith obliged. Neither of them realized that none of his old clothes would fit when he came back.

 

Keith stared at the hearth of the flames, watching them sputter lightly like a weak spark to a match. He felt his skin absorb the heat, making him drowsy as he rested his cheek against his gloved hand. The warmth was a welcome luxury compared to the constant chilliness of the space whale he’d been on for two years.

 

_It was nice being back._

 

The black paladin’s eyes trailed up from the fire and around his spot.

 

_Had everyone gone to bed already?_

 

It seemed so early to Keith, but perhaps that was his Galran side speaking.

 

Krolia had informed him that since he grew faster than humans, his natural need for sleep would dissipate. Now that his growth was completed quickly, his body would slow down and age normally with the other teenagers of the group. He was relieved to hear that, since he didn’t want to start sprouting grey hairs when he technically was only a young adult now. Lance _had_ called him grizzled, though.

 

Keith decided that sitting for so long was taking a toll on his spine, as he rose from his comfortable place by the fire. He waited for it to finally die out, and made his way to the red lion.

His feet crunched along the alien gravel, taking his time as he stared at the stars. He felt a familiar sensation spread through his body.

 

Usually he loved some peace and quiet, but now he just felt… _alone._

 

Keith rested his hands in the small pockets of his jeans as he reached his lion. The crimson metal reflected the stars, creating a red sky on its body.

 

 _Wait_.

_He flew the black lion now. What was he doing?_

 

His eyes flew up to the head of his previous lion. Keith had to squint to see it, but there was a form slumped against Red’s nose, resting. The person was very familiar, and as soon as he saw them, Keith knew it was Lance.

 

The red paladin wasn’t moving, except for the frequent _up_ and _down_ of his chest as he slept. He wasn’t in his armor either, so Keith assumed he was _freezing_ up there. Plus, he was sleeping on _cold metal_.

 

 _Yeah, the red lion spit fire like a dragon, but that didn’t mean it just_ emanated _heat._

 

Keith slanted his eyebrows, irked. Although he _was_ annoyed at Lance for not taking care of himself, he really didn’t have the right to judge. He himself hadn’t made the best decisions when he was in the Blade of Marmora. Still, Keith felt obliged to return his teammate down from the cold, and get him in an actual bed. Or the closest they had to a bed, at least.

 

“Lance!” Keith tried yelling. Unfortunately, his voice only bounced off of the metal of the huge creature. His rough, scratchy throat screamed against the attempt to speak.

 

He managed to convince Red to reach his paw out, climbing up one of his claws. The noise was loud and made Keith cringe as it squeaked, but it was sure to have woken Lance up. Red lifted him up to his head, and he jumped onto the structure, whispering a reluctant _thanks_ as he walked toward the paladin’s limp body.

 

When Keith reached Lance, his eyes trailed over his form. There were bags sinking into the Cuban’s cheekbones, and his face looked suspiciously wet. His skin shone with half-dried tears, which made Keith’s throat tighten.

Something in his chest ached, so he touched Lance lightly on his shoulder to wake him.

Keith felt slightly guilty about invading his privacy, but Lance needed to get down from the height. At least, that’s what Keith thought he was up there for. _Maybe there were other reasons he wanted to be around Lance. He_ had _grown attached to the other male._

 

Slowly, his teammate’s eyes flickered open, rubbing his forehead as he stared drowsily at Keith. Lance slouched upward as he squinted at the black paladin.

 

“Uh, Keith? What are you doing up here?” Lance questioned as he gestured lazily at him, resting an arm on his knee.

 

Keith stood awkwardly as he looked down into Lance’s lidded blue pupils.

 

“I should be asking _you_ the same thing. It’s cold up here.”

 

“Couldn’t tell,” Lance replied sarcastically, tucking his hands into his armpits as he shivered. He stared out at the sky, eyes trailing the stars.

 

Keith continued, trying to push past Lance’s indifference.

“Why are you up here by yourself?” He asked.

 

“Well, _you’re_ here,” Lance replied, but then realized the weight of his words and scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably. A slight blush spread across his cheeks, to Keith’s surprise.

 

“Well, a - anyway, shouldn’t you be in bed, or something?”

 

Keith frowned and shook his head. “Not until you get down from here. None of us want you to freeze.”

 

Lance’s eyebrows tilted downward, expression suddenly turning bitter. His eyes glared into Keith’s. He scowled and moved his arms under his legs, rubbing them together for warmth.

 

“It’s not like anyone cared where I was anyway,” he scoffed. Hurt shone deeply in Lance’s face, and Keith felt a wave of protectiveness rush through his chest.

 

_Of course we do._

 

Keith hesitated before speaking, scanning Lance’s face. The other male looked like he had been on Red’s head for a while. Keith felt guilty for not finding him earlier, since he seemed to be the only person to notice that he wasn’t hanging out around the fire.

 

Keith inhaled deeply. He took a moment to sit down next to him and stare at the ground before asking, “what happened… while I was gone, Lance?”

 

The red paladin’s shoulders tightened as he gripped his hands together. He rested his chin on his knees and sighed.

 

“A lot of things happened, Keith. Geez, you might have even seen them if you were there.”

 

Keith frowned. He contemplated every moment he’d been around Lance when he returned. The difference between Lance from the Garrison and Lance now. The changes were large to say the least.

 

“You’re so… quiet now,” Keith said, more to himself than anything.

 

Lance didn’t reply. Keith saw his mouth open, then close. He looked so _lost._ Like he could stare at the sky forever and never find a reason why. Like he’d been stuck and lonely, just how Keith felt when he left for the Blade.

 

For a while, neither of them said anything. They just stared into space, waiting for someone to give them a reason to stop. Lance was still shivering, but soon Keith realized that his eyes shone with unshed tears. His hands were gripped around each other, knuckles turning as pale as Keith’s skin. Lance looked as if he were to blink, all of the tears would explode into a waterfall.

 

He was careful not to say anything, worried that if he did, Lance would start crying.

Keith hesitated before leaning forward and lifting his arms around the other paladin’s shoulders. His hands hovered above Lance’s body, questions on his lips, and he lightly whispered.

 

“Can I hug you, Lance?”

 

Lance silently fell forward and leaned against Keith’s torso, shivering slightly.

 

“ _Keith_ , _”_ the paladin finally stuttered out, gripping his chest like it was his last strand of hope left in his heart.

 

Keith’s eyebrows tilted up, and he hugged back tightly, waves of sadness wracking his body as Lance cried into his collar.

 

He spoke into the red paladin’s shoulder, gripping stronger. “We’ll fix this, whatever it is,” Keith said, his rough voice turning into a soft whisper.

 

“I _died,_ Keith,” Lance said through tears and gritted teeth.

 

Keith’s fingertips turned cold. He let out a shaky breath, contemplating what to say.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Red got shot while taking a blow for Allura. She brought me back,” he said quietly.

 

Keith didn’t know how to reply. His voice seemed to be caught in his mouth as he conjured up any words he could find.

 

 _What do I say to_ that? Keith thought.

 

“Lance,” he started.

 

“Yeah?”

 

Keith took a deep breath, inhaling the dark scent of the sky.

 

“I care about you,” he said.

 

Lance breathed in sharply, moving his head slightly against Keith, like he was too worried to speak.

 

Keith continued. “Everyone cares about you. But _me,_ I guess it feels like something I haven’t felt before. I don’t know. Just know, you’re great - err, well, - I like you,” the raven said awkwardly.

 

Lance didn’t reply for a while, like he was pondering something, or rather - preparing to say something.

 

“I like you too, Keith. I don’t really know what I’m feeling right now. I’m pretty confused,” he breathed out, “but I know that it’s… it’s something that I don’t want to let go of. I liked Allura a lot.”

 

“Yeah, I can tell.”

 

Lance’s eyes bolted up to Keith’s, panicking. His arms slid down to the Galran’s wrists, squeezing them lightly as he stared at him.

 

“I, I just - I can’t... I don’t... I like you too, a _lot._ I’ve never liked, uh, _guys_ before.” Lance choked out the word like he’d never said it in his life before.

 

“Heh, yeah… I’ve been there. _I’ve_ never liked _girls_ before. That was a funny conversation with Shiro.”

 

Lance stared at Keith before laughing, _loudly._ Soon, it became too contagious not to chuckle along with him.

 

“I thought I was the only one, man…” Lance grinned, wiping a tear from his eye.

 

“You’re not. Not just in _that_ way, we’re a lot more similar than I used to think.”

 

Lance smiled softly and took Keith’s hand in his. They were both lying on Red’s head, staring up at the stars together. The black paladin rested against Lance side, and as he inhaled, a scent emanated off the teenager’s body. He smelled like the sea, despite being so far from home; he smelled like salt water and garlic, like freshly baked bread.

 

“We’re going home. It won’t be long until we’re back, you know.” Keith said.

 

“I know,” Lance replied gently.

 

Soon, both of the paladins fell asleep next to one another.


End file.
